Don't read this text

2008-11-27T14:06:00.001+08:00

ok so i need to learn french.

and also buy a cap, since people keep laughing at my hair. =(

EH WAIT I FORGOT NO MORE EMO POST.

oops

cheers

2008-11-27T11:23:00.002+08:00

have you ever looked in a mirror and not recognize what's on the other side?
i have.
but it's not like the picture above.
i just cut my hair.

HAHAH.
sorry, new resolution. no more emo posts.

the cure to life's many problems are good friends, cigarettes, and whiskey.
and also, there's the foreign legion.

so yeah. =)

cheers

2008-10-07T01:31:00.002+08:00

well, something is definitely wrong with me.

i just don't know what.

i've stopped doing most of the things i used to love.

i think i need an escape from life.

2008-09-06T15:35:00.002+08:00

so it's been another lull period for my blogging, but that's cause i've been busy with lots of stuff.

such as my new found interest, boxing. eventually i'd like to move up to mixed martial arts(MMA) but i'm just gonna start small here. besides, it's FAR from easy.

in an unrelated matter, i find myself caught between a rock and a hard place YET AGAIN.

why did you have to contact me again? i still love you, yet i wish i could forget you. the day you forget me is the day i can finally fade into obscurity.

cheers

2008-08-01T00:57:00.002+08:00

it really feels so bittersweet, to be standing on the threshold of glory, but not being able to make that one step further.

guess Pol-ITE silverware is not my destiny.

but i guess losers are the ones who get knocked down and stay down. normal people get up after a while. but the best are the ones who get knocked down and battered, but still stand up immediately.

and i want to be the best.

cheers

2008-07-28T23:21:00.003+08:00

the world is full of funky shit.

such as this cup of teh peng, masquerading as a cup of orange juice. i swear when it arrived i thought it was radioactive.

and yes i know, this is random. i'm nervous, and this is a way i deal with it. aside from shaking gek hui. but i can't do that now cause i'm at home, and she's probably somewhere in jurong.

cheers

2008-07-22T00:04:00.002+08:00

well today hasn't really been fantastic.

class was boring, lousy rj question.

our damn rugby jerseys are still not ready, they're 'somewhere in china', according to the OSG. we lost the match to SP, had SO MANY calls against us, most of which apparently weren't even valid.

and once again, i decided to play with fire and tempt fate. AGAIN. as stupid as i am, you'd think that even i would have fucking learned by now.

don't feel like saying this but...

cheers

2008-07-20T21:01:00.002+08:00

well, we did it. guess the hard work has paid off, we just gone and made history.

there's this fierce feeling of...i don't know, i guess it's pride. pride deep within my chest. pride because we've turned RP rugby from a joke into a team worth playing.

but the thing is that just as soon as it sinks in, yeah, we won NP, then there's another realization. next game monday. it just seems too fast for me.

but we'll give it our best shot.

"the legacy you face is more intimidating than any opposition. kia mau."

cheers

2008-07-17T15:20:00.001+08:00

goddamn it.

after all these years, the feeling is still there, still as strong as it ever was.

cheers

2008-07-13T23:36:00.002+08:00

as of today i am officially ~$450 poorer. no idea if any of the money spent will be any good. the week still ended rather crappily. =|

hmm.

ps. gekkkkkk, we lost to ACJC. which proves the shaking theory. you is doomed!

cheers

2008-07-12T00:18:00.002+08:00

well today, and by today, i mean yesterday (friday), started out shitty, and didn't really improve from there.

don't feel like elaborating. which is usually a bad sign.

so i'll post this instead.

Underoath - A Boy Brushed Red...Living In Black & White

Can you feel your heartbeat racing?
Can you taste the fear in her sweat?
You've done this wrong,
It's too far gone,
These sheets tell of regret.
I admit that I'm just a fool for you,
I'm just a fool for you.

Here is where we both go wrong.
Tonight's your last chance to
Do exactly what you wanted to,
And this could be my night,
This is what makes me feel alive,
Makes you feel alive.
Here is where we both go wrong,
So sign me up,
And toss this key,
'Cause for now we're
Living in this moment,
And we both ignore the truth:
It's all over,
It's all over.

I feel your heart against mine,
So take a breath and close your eyes, eyes.

Your lungs have failed and they both stopped breathing,
My heart is dead and it's way past beating,
Something has gone terribly wrong.
I'm scared, you're scared, we're scared of this.
I never thought we'd make it out alive.
I never told you but it's all in your goodbyes,
It's all in your goodbyes.

Well look who's dying now.
Slit your wrist for sleeping with the girl next door.
I always knew you were such a sucker for that.
It doesn't matter what you say,
You never mattered anyway,
Never mattered anyway.

In this moment that we both ignore the truth:
It's all over,
It's all over.

I feel your heart against mine,
So take a breath and close your eyes, eyes.

Your lungs have failed and they both stopped breathing,
My heart is dead and it's way past beating,
Something has gone terribly wrong.
I'm scared, you're scared, we're scared of this.
I never thought we'd make it out alive.
I never told you but it's all in your goodbyes,
It's all in your goodbyes.

Don't shake, I hate to see you tremble,
Trembling, you've lost your touch.
Haven't you run so addicted, so addicted.

Your lungs have failed and they both stopped breathing,
My heart is dead and it's way past beating,
Something has gone terribly wrong.
Your lungs have failed and they both stopped breathing,
My heart is dead and it's way past beating,
Something has gone terribly wrong.
I'm scared, you're scared, we're scared of this.
I never thought we'd make it out alive.
I never told you but it's all in your goodbyes,
It's all in your goodbyes.

I never thought we'd make it out alive.
I never thought we'd make it out alive.
I never thought we'd make it out alive.
It's all in your goodbyes.

cheers

2008-07-07T15:02:00.000+08:00

regarding dy's latest post...

Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
han!
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
go see dy's blog
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
nownownow
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
dont tell me u tell him wad i said to u
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
bully
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
serious
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
i didn't
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
ass
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
he used his psychic powers!
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
i bet
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
U TELL HIM
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
u cant keep my dirty little secret
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
i don friend u with the moments
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
talk to my hand
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
for the moments*
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
=(
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
lol
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
okay
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
now go see MY blog
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
dy got link u right?
Mitchell. Neither proud nor ashamed. says:
yep
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
so many links ar him
†anchinhan [c=4]振翰[/c] GUNNERS roar, others meow. says:
so popular

thanks han, i dunno how you do it, but we love you. HAHAHA.

cheers

2008-06-22T06:35:00.002+08:00

finally ended my working week. it's been hell, to a certain extent. busy days, demanding clients, but yeah, am proud to say that BroadcastAsia 2008 is finally overrrrr. hahaha. there goes my conference IC position.

am kinda missing school, but it's all good, will be returning to the hell of school from monday on, which means FYP and all, but i'm already prepped for that.

i've loved you once, more than i've ever loved ANYONE. but now it's gone, faded, so don't expect the same any longer.

cheers

2008-06-10T01:00:00.002+08:00

so it's been a really rough couple of weeks.

relative passing away, RP rugby ALMOST getting closed down, a friend's dad's tragic passing, and injury. FYP's still being a bitch, but at least it's getting there.

what can i say, life's been pretty set on beating me down into the floor, and everytime i try to get up, another problem lands neatly on my lap.

but every cloud has it's silver lining i guess.

we move along.

cheers

2008-05-30T10:13:00.002+08:00

my uncle just passed away in his sleep yesterday, in india.

Rest in peace, uncle cliff, you will be dearly missed.

i guess this is just a lesson to us all. appreciate what you got, before it's gone. don't live in the past, cause you never know which day will be your last.

on that note, i guess i've been doing okay. nearing a month since i've spoken to the girl that usually occupies my thoughts. perhaps i'm finally moving on.

other than that, life's been pretty alright i guess. rugby's still a killer, but definite improvements. FYP's a bitch, just wanna complete it so i can graduate.

and to all my friends, you know who you are, thank you for being who you are. perhaps you don't know it, but each and every one of you guys and girls brighten up my day, in some way or another.

just thought i'd say it out. sometimes it's better to be upfront.

cheers

2008-05-08T23:21:00.002+08:00

okay brace yourselves, it's time for another sporadic entry.

well, nothing much has changed since the last post.

but the key highlight would be my-brother-from-another-mother's 21st birthday, happy birthday eugene. ahahah. went to crystal jade in taka to celebrate with his family and grace (apparently there's like 5 crystal jades in taka alone), more precisely, the la mien and xiaolongbao one. the food, as you may have guessed, was friggin awesome. hahah..

aaaaaaaaand training has begun. still tough, still trying to get my super unfit self to get used to it. we've got :

Monday - Gym + Cardio (run, 4.8km)
Tuesday - Fieldwork + Interval training
Wednesday - Gym + Cardio (run, 4.8km)
Thursday - Fieldwork + Interval training

no joke i tell you. somehow it seemed going for club and school trainings last year was somewhat easier. but then, it's all in the mind i guess. on a side note, i'm pretty happy with the majority of the year 1s. most of them are picking up the game very quickly.

other than that, i have no other things to blog about. sad but true, rugby has pretty much taken over my social life. hahah oh well. guess it's just another sacrifice for the greater goal. and i set that goal a looooooooong time ago.

cheers

2008-04-28T14:18:00.003+08:00

okayyy i just finished doing a presentation on my own. which is a kinda weird feeling. heh.

anyway i've been looking at some old photos, a lot of them rugby related. and goddamn it, do i miss NRC rugby. it's different, so much different from Pol-ITE level. sure, with Wolfpakz we lost so much more than we won. in fact, i think i NEVER won a match in Wolfpakz colors before. but fuck all that, it was the experience that mattered. call me sick, but i actually smile at the memory of getting tossed out of the field by a premiership player for the 2007 NRC 7s, and getting knocked senseless by that fijian (though i still swear it was a truck in the NS Wanderers jersey) during the Midnight 10s. and most of all, i cherish that time we got thrashed by SRC, in game 1 of the national league season 2007. why? simply because that was the game that taught me never to give up, ever. we walked out of there losing by more than a hundred points, but i walked out of that field with my head high.

and this year? Wolfpakz is a distant memory. at the rate things are going with school rugby, i think club rugby is a no for this year. let's hope it's worth it.

and yeah, i miss a few other things from my past too.

cheers

2008-04-27T23:43:00.002+08:00

well well well i've not blogged for ages, so i guess since i've got a bit of time now, i'll update.

i honestly don't remember everything that i've done since the last update, but the main stuff would be like:

going to london!

which was awesome, but i still haven't uploaded the photos. check your facebooks for the details. ahaha.

becoming single again.

which is probably for the best.

school starting.

which sucks. especially FYP. =|

and rugby!

which always manages to come up in my entries. have been flooded with rugby-related work since school started, but hopefully the constant flow of work will end soon. made it into the team on the first try this year, which was an incredible feeling. the next step is of course, the final 30 for the Pol-ITE squad, then the starting line-up. also, supposed to try-out for nationals this year, but at the current level of work that i have to cope with, probably not this year. still contemplating if i should make an attempt for U-20s, but i guess that's unlikely. my priority this year is RP Rugby, so i'll havta see how things go.

took some of my own advice on saturday, went down to ECP with the usual suspects, spent some time looking at stars, watching the waves crash in, chilling out with a cigarette in the sea breeze, and basically let nature sooth my troubled mind. strange how the two things in life that make me happy are so different. rugby and being near the sea. well, there's actually THREE things in life that make me happy, but then the third one's private. ;)

cheers

2008-01-14T00:45:00.000+08:00

thought i'd share a couple of jokes with you all...

An American consultant was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Mexican replied, "Only a little while." The American then asked, "Why don't you stay out longer and catch more fish? The Mexican said, "Well, I catch enough to feed my family." The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life, senor." The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard graduate and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village and move to Mexico City, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise." The Mexican fisherman asked, "But senor, how long will this all take?" To which the American replied, "15-20 years." "But what then, senor?" The American laughed and said, "That's the best part. When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions." "Millions, senor? Then what?" The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small coastal fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take siesta with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos."

this shows, be happy with your life. if you've got money in your pocket, a computer to read this on, 4 meals a day, an family and friends that love you for you, i think you are pretty much leading a better life than at least half the world's population.

and secondly...

Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong. Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! -Jillian" He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?" "Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door. Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?" His son replies, "Oh THAT... Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!" Broken Coffee Table, $239.99. Hot Breakfast, $4.20. Two Aspirins, 38 cents. Saying the right thing at the right time. PRICELESS!

ahahah...this, i think, teaches you that having a glib tongue is handy, ESPECIALLY when drunk. hee.

cheers

2007-12-29T11:02:00.000+08:00

good morning one and all.

so it's damn early (for me during the holidays), and i really ought to be sleeping, but the god damn neighbors upstairs have been doing construction, so it's noisy and my powers of hibernation are not working. which sucks bad.

anyways, christmas has just passed. i love christmas. it's like the one time in the year where people around the world just celebrate, and revel in the holiday spirit. why the rest of the year cannot be like this escapes me, but then i'll leave that question to smarter people than me to answer. there's a myth/legend that says that during the bloody trench fighting of world war 1, there was an unspoken ceasefire during christmas, 1914, and that the english and germans actually left their trenches to sing carols among themselves, and the germans approached the english for a friendly match of football. (well, as 'friendly' a match as 2 sides having a war can have) i'd like to believe it's true, and who knows? it may have well been.

before christmas, there was the rugby tour to KL. i think it was a great experience. though the smokers (and a couple of non-smokers who hung around) probably came back with a much higher chance of lung cancer, due to cigarettes being about a 1/3 the cost as they are back home, and some of us shared a couple of rough experiences, it brought the team closer, which i feel is the major point of a tour. our 2-0 record against the m'sian schools were just icing on the cake.

and to close, the new year is just around the proverbial corner. i think 2007 has been good. there were a few bad incidents, but more good ones, and all i can hope for is that 2008 will be as good as this year, if not better. i'd like to set resolutions, but i know i'll never keep them, so i end this with a 'Happy New Year to all'. in advance. =)

cheers

2007-12-05T00:29:00.000+08:00

so the 1st game of Pol-ITE is over and done with.

we lost, around 39-9 (congrats to eugene wilkinson, with all 9 points to his name), but compared to last year, we were simply excellent against SP, the supposedly best side. guess the old saying 'The first the worst, the second the same, the last the best of all the game' really applies here, since the next match we have is against TP.

but i'm proud to take the field with these bunch of guys. long, short or tall, rugby unites us all. AWOO bros!

cheers

2007-11-26T04:43:00.000+08:00

okay, so the day has barely started and it's fucked up already. not only have i seen something which is the possibility of ruining my mood for the next couple of weeks, if not months, but to top it off, i'm out of cigarettes too.

the decision has been made, but you know what? fuck it. that's what i think.

no one is ever going to tell me my limits. i'll set my own limits, and even then they'll only be there for me to exceed them.

i guess blogging is still good for relieving stress. though nothing beats a good game of rugby, good food, alcohol (lots of it) and a smoke. but i'm trying to get rid of the smoke.

yet another post soaked with mystery and rhetoric.

cheers

2007-10-31T23:11:00.000+08:00

helllllllllllllo.

once again, i'm brushing the cobwebs off my blog, to post, yet again. and speaking of cobwebs, happy halloween!

i could blog about my recent history, but that would take an extraordinary amount of time and i'm just plain lazy. hahah. suffice to say, life's just been a bit of a rollercoaster.

was at the scc 7s recently, and my god, the standard of play is just incredible. here's to hoping i somehow wind up being able to take part in a year or 2. AND YES I SAW MY FAVORITE FAT GIRL THERE! HEEHEE. =X

okay, 2 things that i'd like the share

1st, it's always good to have a personal opinion, but only a fool stays in a burning building when he already smells smoke.

2nd, it's really true, escape artists never die.

hahah. the meanings of the above 2 statements, i shall leave for everyone to infer for themselves.

til next time;

cheers

2007-09-27T00:34:00.000+08:00

It's hard to escape from a blackout.

But I think I'm finally free.

cheers

2007-09-24T01:22:00.000+08:00

hello hello.

boredom strikes, so i choose to blog when i should definitely be sleeping.

well, it's world cup season, and somehow i just feel that most teams, save for maybe the springboks, aren't really performing as well as they should. ah well, i guess that's what makes the world cup exciting.

4 days of rugby is killing me slowly. monday and wednesday, club training, which equates to club fitness. tuesday and thursdays, are school trainings, and though there's temporarily no fitness for contact, (though i have this impending sense of doom that another killer fitness session is approaching) there's 2 sessions, because of touch and contact.

still contemplating if i should 'quit' touch. my heart says stay on for both, because there is no such thing as 'enough' game time, but then my head says just pick one, which for me will be contact, hands down, to avoid getting burnout.
because at this point in time my life revolves around training hard, coming home late, struggling out of bed to get to school, then hibernating in the weekends because i'm so burnt out.

and aside from all this i'm still juggling other matters. really trying to force myself to start jogging/gymming as a stress reliever, because my current stress reliever, smoking, is slowly but surely giving me lung cancer. which sucks real bad.

cheers

2007-09-09T07:29:00.000+08:00

"This is the Eurasian Swift.

It's flying swiftly above Eurasia.

Nothing too interesting about that right?

Well, it can stay in the air for up to 3 years.

Sorry, nobody knows why."

- Quote from Freaky Facts, on Animal Planet.

I may have found a new potential profession.

hahah what the fuck.

cheers

2007-09-09T03:40:00.000+08:00

oh my god. i'm still coming down from my high.

i just went to see

Funeral
For
A
fucking
Friend

good lord. imagine listening to a band, almost every single day of your life. memorizing their lyrics, breaking down their songs mentally, trying to understand the deeper meanings within the music, relating it to your daily trials and tribulations, sometimes even helping you through your shittiest of days...

...and then seeing them live, on stage, in front of your fucking face.

no good pictures, but every moment, every song is tattooed in my mind now.

listening to them off a CD of mp3 will NEVER be the same again.

cheers

2007-09-05T02:15:00.000+08:00

okay i haven't updated in damn long.

in my defence, it's because i almost forgot i had a blog. hahah.

anyway, i've been mainly busy with rugby. 4 days of training a week, plus a game on the weekend is no joke, but happy to say, i'm getting used to it. fitness levels are probably at the highest that they've ever been in my life, so it's all good. flip side is that with so much rugby, i've not really had time to do anything else, which includes sleeping. which is fucked up. hahah.

oh yes, injured my shoulder recently at training. something popped somewhere, so there's like a lump where they shouldn't be a lump. which is not good, but yeah, i guess it happens.

took part in the midnight 7s, or more precisely, 10s, a while back. we lost all our matches, but it was a fantastic experience.

before i forget, met up with my elective classmates before going to the midnight 10s. spent an hour just chilling at coffee club and listening to them talk about girl stuff, but it was nice hanging out with them. makes me regret not coming for more classes, but oh well. AND JANE TAKES NICE PHOTOS! doubt she will read this, but i love this photo. considering hiring her to take photos of our rugby matches. hahah.

guess that's about it, for now. i know for most people this post will be really boring, but yeah, it's been my life recently, so deal. you can kiss my skinny white ass if you expect me to apologise for the game i love. hahah. \m/

for the rugby lovers/ All Blacks fans.
http://download.guardian.co.uk/sys-video/Media/video/2007/08/31/AdidasPitchAd.mov

cheers

2007-08-08T13:29:00.001+08:00

okay due to popular demand, i shall take time off my busy busy schedule to blog about my birthday.

before i start, i'd just like to share this with you all, because it really cracked me up. hahaha.

Saw Mitchell the birthday boy ahha. I think he didn't have a clue that he was gonna get a surprise party at his house. - Taken from Melissa's blog.

Like DUH honey, it WAS a surprise you know.

okay anyway, woke up by myself (amazingly), more or less in sync with my mum, because as i was wondering why in hell would i want to crawl out of bed at that ungodly hour (it was about 9ish in the morning), she knocked and asked me to get up. which was wierd, because she it normally takes about half an hour of concentrated screaming at me before i leave my sanctuary, namely, my bed. so normally she won't bother waking me on the weekends. however, she did. which is weird thing number 1.

but, i had already promised eugene that i'd go to turf, because he said i'd probably have to play, even though i wasn't named in the team. okay, so get out of bed, called eugene, WHO WAS ALREADY AWAKE (weird thing number 2). then took a shower, packed my stuff, and left for turf.

reached early, so watched the girls do their warm-ups, then caught their match, followed by the mixed team match, and finally the mens match. and i didn't play, so i effectively went all the way to turf city to get sunburnt.

cleaned up, and then i realized i forgot to bring extra underwear. fuck. hahahah. but oh well, walked to the turf city shopping center, then i thought i left my sunglasses back at the pitch, so after being fucking worried, and rushing back to the field (and chain-smoking 2 sticks, sorry i was stressed), i remembered that i left it in another pocket in my bag. heex.

then went to far east, to look for eugene's jacket. i was rushing, because i THOUGHT i would be going to baybeats, to catch AVA. but then he was happily slacking there. (weird thing number 3). so since i THOUGHT i was late, i decided that i should take a cab back home, to save time. which actually threw the plans into slight disarray.

so while in the cab, my mum called, saying that she may need me to drop by ubi on the way home, to pick up a cabinet. (weird thing number 4). and then she called again to cancel it.

then nicole called, out of the blue, saying that she was near 85, and wanted to have dinner. which was weird thing number 5. hahah. so went to meet her and trevor, with eugene. saw jill, and melissa, with jiahui, joy and all. then 'rushed' back home.

and as i was walking home, i noticed that my TV was on. which is the last weird thing of the night, at number 6. hahaha.

walked into my place, and the rest, as they would say, is history.

i'd like to sincerely thank everyone who showed up, especially those who slaved like mad just to get everything done. and no grace, i didn't cry secretly. even if i did, i wouldn't tell you, because it would ruin my tough rugby player facade, and secondly, if i told you it wouldn't be a secret anymore. but once again, thank you all very very much. you've all made me a very happy man. =)

cheers

2007-07-30T22:55:00.001+08:00

well well...

a few more days and i'll be 19.

but for this birthday, same as the last couple, i doubt i'll get what i really want.

though the materialistic things are most likely mine already.

try, try again, yet still fail everytime. sigh.

cheers

2007-07-29T22:56:00.000+08:00

well, today went to watch the girls at their contact finals...blacks defeated src, but then there was some controversy over the ref for the 2nd half. oh well, no point complaining, it was a good match, especially to src. loved the heart that they showed.

in other rugby news, i've been recalled to the RP squad. good news for me i guess, since it'll be that much easier to get selected for nationals.

and i'm still mulling over a decision that i've struggled with for a LONG time. oh well, i guess if life was easy there'd be no point in living it.

cheers

2007-07-18T23:57:00.000+08:00

having writers block for training post-mortem again. maybe it's cause i'm just tired.

school's fine, just that 4 days of high-intensity work-outs in a week are taking their toll. no idea where i find the energy to keep going, being stupid, laughing and all.

but my dream is still alive, i still DO want to break into the national team.

my other dreams are still there too, let's hope i don't crack again.

cheers

2007-07-13T01:04:00.000+08:00

pardon this post, cause it's going to deviate from my usual cheery posts into a somewhat depressing one.

ever wonder what would happen if you went to sleep tonight, and didn't wake up?

i just did, on the bus ride home.

and frankly, i don't know how the world will remember me.

i used to have all these goals that i wanted to achieve and now i don't seem to have fulfilled even a single one of them.

hopefully this is just my nervousness that's making me type all this shit.

cheers

2007-07-05T00:28:00.000+08:00

I'm so messed up these few days that i can't even focus on rugby.

And quite frankly, it scares the shit outta me.

Sorry, but if you ask me, I'll lie to you. It's probably for our own good, anyway...

cheers

2007-06-29T16:31:00.000+08:00

well, time to blog again.

camp was fun, i really liked the new year 1s and their attitudes, too bad there were some cock-ups, but i think that everything worked out fine in the end.

worked for Ascend during the holidays, and it was fun. good money too.

WolfPakz training has started, and we're playing in the national league this year, formerly known as division 1. i'm getting nervous everytime i even think about it. i mean, normally i'm not afraid of bigger, tougher, more skilled rugby players, and i don't think i am even now. but shittt, this is fast. i mean, i never even thought i'd be anywhere near div 1, and now, here i am. but, like all the senior guys say, fear is a driving force. passion is fuel. so i guess i've got to be ready by the 21st of july.

but i'm more than happy to be back playing rugby again, especially at club level. it's still my little escape from all the troubles in daily life.

i hope. cause if i don't i've got nothing.

cheers

2007-06-26T15:44:00.000+08:00

VINDICATED! I AM SELFISH, I AM WRONG, I AM RIGHT, I SWEAR I'M RIGHT.....

this post is just to humor simonne.

cheers

2007-06-09T20:03:00.000+08:00

okayyy blogging again. i really need to schedule a little bit of time in my life to just like sit down, chill out, and just turn my feelings and emotions into little bits of data that just form up into text, just like the stuff you're reading now.

well, i still haven't gotten my Sick Of It All photos, because i'm still waiting for that fuckface pantat. or should it be pantatface fuck? hmm. anyway, i'm still waiting for him to send them to me.

went to have shisha night with some of my classmates a while back. hahah. it was fun. Si****e fell asleep and Cryst*l got high. from a shisha. which i've never seen happen before. really. i didn't mention names ok, so don't worry, no one knows. hahah. took quite a few photos, which i really ought to post, but i'm lazy. hehee.

then there was anberlin and copeland's secret show, at homeclub. was supposed to go, BUT i was somewhat too fashionably late, with crystal, so we didn't go. HOWEVER, i took a piss beside the lead singer of anberlin. hahah. messaged somebody while on the bus home, but she fell asleep after a while. pig. hahah.

then came our class clubbing outing, with agnes, simonne, crystal, calvin and nison. took photos there too, which i should post, but i won't, cause of the afore mentioned reason. hahah. eugene and grace joined us at DXO, and i think for an underage party, it was pretty alright. just that the lack of a crowd was kinda boring. but there was more than enough alcohol going around. which was free, so that always spells a good night. hahah. but i barely got high, for some reason. damnnnn. hahah. went to bras brasah for brekkie at macs, then home.

met nicole after that, basically just accompanied her while she did her project proposal. but it was fun. i got to read about weight-loss, so i'm happily avoiding foods that don't make you fat. hahaha. went to kfc after that, for dinner, then walked her to interchange, cause i was afraid she'd get lost, then home. nice seeing her, as it always is.

and then yesterday night i went to meet shaik, after spending the whole day with my mum. made our way down to clarke quay, to meet up with dy, joe and sherman for a while, before they went back. then we headed to the forbidden city, or bar cocoon, for a rather expensive beer. 12 freaking bucks! but then corona with a wedge of lime is always nice, and sometimes it's alright paying for the ambience. then we went to katong, supposedly to meet jj and all, but they cancelled the dota session, so we decided to go to some dodgy pub in geylang to meet up with his army friends. then we went to some wierd thai disco in golden mile. IT WAS A CLEAN PLACE, MIND YOU! and continued drinking there. drank quite a bit, but still didn't get drunk, which is always a good thing, cause i just think it's always important to know my limits. then back to geylang, for supper, then home for a well-deserved rest.

mummy left for indonesia today, so i've got the house til sat again, though i'll be at touch camp from tomorrow til wednesday.

oh yeah, i've just finished reading the supposed lost diary of Don Juan. for those who have no idea of who he is, he was basically the greatest player to ever walk the earth, but somehow still managed to give up, women, money, power and fame for...you guessed it, he gave it up for love. hahah. it seems a little surprising, but when you look back on your own life, you'll probably find out that you did some wierd things because of love. i know i have. hahah.

so i'll blog again once i'm home. til then, people.

cheers

2007-05-31T00:18:00.000+08:00

hello. blogging while i got the time.

finally submitted my PP. today was the deadline. so of course i just HAD to submit it at the last minute. however, there's a good chance that it'll be accepted, cause i already asked my mentor and she said yes. so yay!

SP#1 has been delayed, unfortunately. held back by about a week. hopefully it'll work out.

SP#2 has also hit a snag, so i'm trying to work my way around it. SP#1 can and may fail, but i've already done my bit for that so it's already out of my hands, but SP#2 is PERSONAL, so it won't fail. my pride will die. and i'm a leo. we LIVE on pride. hahah.

so now i'm waiting for eugene and grace to reach here. doubtful that i'll be going for the contact match tomorrow later. kinda lazy and i just want to get some rest while i can, because i intend to work during the hols.

cheers

2007-05-28T04:53:00.000+08:00

well well well, 5 a.m. in the goddamn morning and i can't get back to sleep. probably my fault, for sleeping in just now. mind's kinda racing now, cause i just found something to keep me busy. shall name it Secret Project #2, cause there's already a Secret Project #1 (hereby refered to as SP#1/SP#2).

going to hit the gym later. like finally, after i've been saying that i wanna go for so long. then followed by a jog tomorrow, and touch at night. then gym again on wednesday. followed by maybe another jog, on thursday, with touch again. provided i've got enough time, cause i'm supposed to go club. then wolfpakz meeting on friday. also something that i've been waiting for. i miss club training, even though i feel like i should be dead after every training. but it's a good kinda i-should-be-dead feeling. heh.

mum's gone overseas again. won't be back til the weekend. i kinda miss my mummy. hahah. for those of you that still don't know, yes, i AM a mummy's boy.

and my goal for this week is to hand in my PP proposal, go to school every single day, and to try to find a job.

and make somebody smile, when i've got the time =)

cheers

2007-05-26T17:45:00.000+08:00

hello hello hello...if anyone still visits here, besides nicole, and only cause i think i mentioned it yesterday, say hello. this is my 180th post by the way.

well i've been a busy man. lots of rubbish has been happening recently, had me stressed out but then i just stopped giving a fuck, so i'm more or less back to normal, unfortunately.

so to celebrate me getting back to normal, i shall post an extremely funny conversation that happened between me and nicole.

Scene : RP Sports Complex, SMU Touch Carnival. Me standing at the seating area, She's directly below, checking out the scoreboard. We make some small talk, and then i start distracting her by telling her i'm gonna drop a rugby ball on her head.

Nicole : eh shaddap lah, i cannot hear the thing. *points at scoreboard*
Me : hear what? you're LOOKING at the scoreboard, not listening to it.
Nic : *realises what she just said, gives a mortified look*
Me : *proceed to laugh my butt off*

for people that actually know that BIGGER stupid dumb kukubum, try imagining her face when she found out what she said. it makes it all the more funny, i tell you. HAHAHA.

that said, yesterday i had the oppertunity to go catch a concert. New York Hardcore band Sick Of It All was in town, and they were fucking awesome. It was the best damn gig i've ever been to in my life. even managed to get a photo with the guitarist, Pete Koller. the energy inside the room could have blown the fucking roof off.

and yeah, before i forget...FUNERAL FOR A FRIEND IS COMING TO SINGAPORE IN SEPTEMBER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCK YEAH!

sorry. i had to let that out. hahah. anyway, i guess that's it.

cheers

2007-04-25T01:15:00.000+08:00

hey all, just a quick update.

school has started. normally that would be bad news. but then this means that i can finally learn what the fuck my diploma is actually about. which is slightly better news. and my classmates seem pretty alright, nice people, so i guess this 6 months that i spend in e25m will be fun. which means neutral news. and my modules are kinda interesting. which makes it moderately good news. and also rugby has started again. which sums it all up at great news.

hahah. life's been ok i guess, just that i've been going out almost everyday after school, and i need to cut down on my spending. but i guess it's all good, at least it keeps my mind in a positive light yeah?

well, i guess that's it for now. i'll post a more substantial update when my schedule frees up i.e. not soon. but i'll try lah.

cheers

2007-04-14T23:34:00.000+08:00

goddamnsonofabitch, i'm FUCKING SICK! roar.

shit. if there's 1 thing i really hate, it's being sick. and being sick on the day where i was suppsoed to enjoy the last time clubbing before school starts. fucked up.

cheers

2007-04-12T01:20:00.000+08:00

yawwwwwwwwwwwn.

ok i just woke up. hahah. bit of a pig, yes i know, but i was tired after the chalet so sue me. ah yes, the chalet. well, it wasn't exactly perfect, due to some misunderstandings, but, but BUT! i won't talk about that, cause it's like in the past already, so i just hope that everyone learns from this experience. other than that, it was great. haven't had the chance to meet with the team much for this holiday, and i guess i kinda missed the retards. hmm. RP Retards? opinions on how good a rugby team name that is, anyone? but yeah, we drank, we had fun, we drank somemore, we had somemore fun, and etc. here's some random photos.

the chalet wall! -_-

david.

kenny.

me!

and the woman of the chalet, grace!

hahah. just wanted to post a shout-out to you grace, thanks for everything, and i mean EVERYTHING, because i really feel that no you would mean no chalet. =)

that's all for now, folks.

cheers

2007-04-08T23:35:00.000+08:00

ok so this is the main update, after so long.

well, like i said, i've been really busy since school ended. got caught smuggling my number 1 addiction back into the country, with uncle melvin, so there's us in lockup.
and no, i'm not proud of it, i'm actually putting this up to show what happens to idiots who smuggle things. ESPECIALLY cigarettes. so please, if you smoke and are reading this, learn from my mistakes. and for god's sake, don't smile and take photos in the god damn lock-up.

then, rugby training was on, and we had 2 friendly matches, against SMU and Armour Division, respectively. played in both matches, and SMU was ok, i think i did better than normal, and even went back into the smelly mass of the forward pack for the final quarter of the game. Armour Div. hah! different story altogether. they were lacking a few players, so harry put me into the armour side. i was like, 'sure, no worries, i can do it.' so i went to meet the armour guys, and they were a pretty friendly bunch, although the pre-match pep talk was a bit wierd, cause i was trying to get psyched to play against RP. go figure. then...
bad news number 1.
Armour Captain : so, what positions do you guys play?
Me : um..winger.
Pantat : wing.
AC : who's more experienced?
Me : er...me.
AC : good! you go in at fullback, ok?
Me : hey, man, i've never even smelled the fullbac-
AC : nevermind! you'll be fine!
righto. so there i went. off into the great unknown! and it was ok, i guess. they covered my ass pretty well, so no tries went in due to me. then...
bad news number 2 came along.
being the fullback, i'm the supposed last line of defence. so along came a huge bastard, who broke through the lines. and i went, 'ok, he's mine, i'm going to tackle him off the field.' then, BANG! and the next thing i remember is flying through the air, and thinking 'hmm, i think something went wrong.' then i landed, and couldn't get up, cause i felt like i had a grapefruit on my forehead, just under the line of the scrumcap.

and day 2.

hahah. moral of the story is 'LOVE rugby, though it HURTS'

then work started. working for Ascend Computer Rental and Ascend Audio/Visual. setting up events. tiring, but fun. good pay, good co-workers. and i feel it gives me a chance to see the event management line from the very bottom, so i can now roughly tell what makes a good or bad event manager. hopefully when i enter the line (if i enter the line), i'll be a good one. one event for them turned into many events, so i actually got less time to spend doing my own stuff. was supposed to go for a little holiday, to unwind and de-stress, but it's all good. no better feeling than spending your own cash.

in other news, daiyu and bulu are coming into RP, more specifically, RP rugby. so that's great, hopefully this batch are better, and we'll finally get somewhere as a rugby team. and shaik went in the PTP batch of his NS. 23rd Singapore Artillery.

went to sentosa today, for the usual dose of beach rugby. finally, there are hot girls at sentosa! hahah. popped my toe though =\. we had a few rounds of touch and contact, then it rained, but being crazy as we are, we just carried on. i think i'm getting a flu as a result. left as chermain and co. arrived, cause we were supposed to meet shaik at vivo for dinner before he booked in. reached the monorail station just as he messaged to tell us that he was sick and booking in straight. so we went back to join chermain and all. tried to teach bulu what i knew about place kicks and managed to pop my toe. again. hahah. then to vivo for dinner, then home sweet home.

i'll be at my ruggers chalet til wednesday, so i'll try to update when i get back. for now that should be it.

I'm moving on, slowly, step by tiny step. It still hurts, and I keep falling back. Deep down, I still love you, but I know I need to move on. But tonight, I'll break my rule just once more, for you.

cheers

2007-03-29T00:39:00.000+08:00

hello hello hello...

this is just a short post to keep the dust and cobwebs and the occasional naggy reader(kidding! =X) away. also to let most of you know that i'm still not dead. yet.

basically, i've been really busy with lots of stuff since feb 14th. school ended, but work's started. i'm working almost everyday, which is good, cause it helps me pay back certain debts, gives me experience in the line that i'll be aiming to work for in the future, and keeps me from letting my mind wander to places where i'm not ready to wander to yet. if ever. and bad, cause it's keeping me from my bed. =\. and rugby. =\ x2. and seeing my friends. =\ x3. including naggy cows like sheila pang. =D. =X.

but yes, that's it.

oh yes, i know i promised to upload the photos of my gloriously swollen eyelid, but i'm lazy, so i'll get it done soon, definitely after april the 4th, but before school starts, on april the...well, april.

cheers

2007-02-14T20:48:00.000+08:00

well, it's valentine's.

so happy valentine's to all, who actually want it.

cheers

2007-02-14T01:14:00.000+08:00

good god, why do problems have to come at me in what seems to be a fucking endless cycle?
exactly what the fuck have i done which is so wrong that these things never seem to fucking end?
to think i believe in karma, 'what goes around, comes around'...
so just when is my luck or good fortune going to 'come around'?

seriously, life is fucked when you start having serious thoughts that maybe being on the inside of a coffin is better than being out of one.

i think i'm going to be on anti-depressants soon.

cheers

2007-02-06T13:58:00.000+08:00

There Is A God, And His Name Is Jonny.

woot...just saw the 2nd 6 nations match...england vs scotland...more importantly, the return of jonny wilkinson...england won 42-20...super inspirational match...really gets me going. hahah...if i can perform half as well on saturday as he did today i'll be the happiest man around, for that few moments, anyway...

caught italy and france in the morning...italy lost, after a slightly promising start...and later at night there's ireland and wales...

finally, something suitably inspiring to drag me out of bed after spending a few days there...hahah...nothing like rugby to get the body working again.

cheers

2007-02-04T20:27:00.000+08:00

well well, if it isn't insomnia, then it's some other problem...for now, it's a fever...1 minute i'm perfectly fine, next thing i know, i'm bed-ridden, with no appetite...

lovely eh?

life has to suck in a way, i guess...if not i don't think i'd know what bliss would be...

cheers

2007-02-01T02:06:00.000+08:00

hi all, i would just like to say a loud 'FUCK YOU' to insomnia, because it's killing me and making me sleepy at all the wrong hours.

other than that, life's been different, but i'm getting used to it. hahah...school's ending in a little more than a week. finally, cause i really need a break for a while, and 9 weeks sounds good. may even be heading to perth , for a touch rugby tour.

anyway, i'm off i guess, just a short update, to keep the cobwebs away.

cheers

2007-01-17T03:31:00.000+08:00

yay.

330 in the morning, and i've got insomnia. and there's school tomorrow.

so been thinking. wondering, actually about some stuff. like how i wonder life would be like if i didn't exist. how much of an impact do i make on my family, friends, loved ones? wierd, but yeah.

also another thing. sometimes people do things, and these actions get judged by others as 'wrong' or 'stupid' or selfish'. thing is, have you ever thought about the reasons behind the actions? what would you do, if it was you that was affected?

i need school to end, like soon. once it does, i need a holiday. a long one. and probably a job. cause there are a lot of things which i don't want to think about now. or maybe ever.

shall have a smoke, to (hopefully) shut down my upper brain functions, so i'll be able to get some sleep.

cheers

2007-01-04T23:41:00.000+08:00

school has started! again!

well, feels a bit wierd, going back to school after the 1 month break...taking the 1 hour journey there and back...but yeah, guess i've missed school life...it's all well and good having your own time, but then being too free does have it's downsides too...seems a bit strange actually...almost like i haven't spent all that much time with my sem 2 classmates, but in 4 1/2 weeks time, they'll be ex-classmates...and in 13 1/2 weeks, i'll be a year 2 student...i'd say time flies, but that so cliche, so um...time sprints. yeah. time really sprints. =B

random thought time! sometimes i think people get to preoccupied with life and all that comes along with it, that we don't stop to really appreciate the people around us. i'm blessed, because there are more than a few people around me who seem to be able to make me smile, even when i'm going through some pretty rough shit. so this bit is dedicated to you guys and girls (you ought to know who you are.) thanks!

cheers

2007-01-02T23:04:00.000+08:00

sometimes, knowing everything is a pain in the ass.

honestly, i think my life isn't stressful. i've got a good family, enough money to be comfortable, doing alright for academic areas, and playing a sport i love. and no girlfriend to worry about. sounds good. til i get to the part about friends. see, i'm an only child. so when i've got friends who are so close til i treat them as almost my blood, when they have problems, i'll make it my own. some may say i'm prying, but the fact is that is to me, that's the best way to solve a problem. take it in hand, divide it up, then smash it to pieces. sounds good in theory...

but the irony is sometimes it leaves me feeling more stressed up than the person facing it. heh.

but yeah, doesn't matter. i live life with no regrets. =)

on a side note, it's back to school for secondary schools, RP and TP (dunno about the other polys) but anyway, happy 1st day (=

cheers

2006-12-30T16:35:00.000+08:00

hello all...since apparently i've got a reader who wishes to be unknown requesting me to blog, i think i shall...it's been a pretty wild few days...

dad arrived on the 20th of this month...saw me with long hair and proclaimed that he liked it...heh...

then it was x'mas...had some people over for the gathering i held...i think most of us had fun...talked a bit to some people...it IS the official time to spend with family, friends and loved ones after all, although for the life of me, i can't figure out why there should be 1 special day in the entire year for it...aren't most of us spending our daily lives with family, friends and loved ones already?

couple of days after that, my parents went overseas. guangzhou, to be precise. leaving me alone at home. which spells house party, in case you don't know me all that well. here's the surprising part. me, self-proclaimed spoilt brat, did house work. *gasp* like sweeping the floor, washing cups and throwing away rubbish. eh i know it ain't much but save it ok? another surprising thing. i cut my hair. *GASP* but not by much lah. only trimmed off about +-4cm. but enough to get rid of the split-ends and spoilt hair at the tips, and most of the bleached parts. feel like going to dye it again though. hmm.

parents coming back tomorrow night. going to miss the freedom, but then i guess it balances with missing them. hahah...filial son talking here...

thinking quite a bit of the topic of moving on recently. not just for me, but some of my close friends too. guess it's the season. perhaps everyone wants a lonely new year. hahah...but what i've learnt is that it's almost always better to move on as soon as you can, because the longer you linger, the more attached it gets. yes i know the feeling, no need to describe to me. and maybe another tip would be to get rid of the stuff that brings back memories. obviously, this is not meant as a be-all-and-end-all guide, just some random thoughts.

anywayyy, be happy with yourselves, people. get pissed drunk on the new year if it helps, but be sober for the 1st day of school/work/whatever. and don't drink and drive. studies prove that it's detrimental to health.

cheers

2006-12-17T04:05:00.000+08:00

hey all. finally finished the painting of the house. mum's room is spectrum red, dressing area is orange paste, and the store room is beige. all paints and colors sponsored by Nippon Paint Pte Ltd. and that hardware shop in simpang. but i can't remember the name off the top of my head. some chinese name i think.

anyway, i wanted to blog. but that now that i'm here typing all this, i can't remember what exactly i was aiming to blog about. hmm.

seems like quite a few people are switching to livejournal. i'll be loyal and old-school and stick to blogger. hahah. if blogger closes down, perhaps i'll keep a diary. and if i lose that, maybe i'll paint hieroglyphics on my walls. =)

seems that i'm rather addicted to alexisonfire, saosin, korn and skindred these past few days. screamo, scream/emo, heavy nu-metal, ragga-punk metal. hmm. wierd. as is my taste in music. by the way, it's spoken as alexis-on-fire, not alex-is-on-fire, and say-oh-sin, not sao-sin.

and as i reach the end of this post, i realize that it's actually quite random. probably comes with watching the lighting flashes while smoking and trying to blog at the same time. or perhaps it's another side of the new me. along with the use of fullstops/periods. like this one. =)

cheers

2006-12-15T00:21:00.000+08:00

hello all...i was about to type 'it's been an eventful past few days', but then i realized something...i always say that. so that got me thinking. when people have a blog about their daily lives (read: NOT luciana), they usually blog right away after an eventful day, no? and i don't seem to do that. maybe it's because, usually, after an eventful day/night, i'm usually too shagged to blog. so i figured it's either that everyone has more energy than me, or that i'm retarded. i think the 2nd option is the truth, but it's open to debate. =B

ANYYYYYYWAY, back to where i was. after the last post, i decided to try to get some rest. but then i noticed that the sun is actually quite bright in the morning. goddamn sun. so went out, to meet my mum, cause she abused her birthday (note: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MUM, you old cow you...whoops =X) powers and left work early...went to heeren to eat at billy bombers, and look at stuff before going to taka. browsed through a while, then bought a graphic novel. then went to meet shi xian and marcus. haven't met them in a while, and shi xian's going to army tomorrow. well, technically it's today, but it's my blog, so if i say tomorrow, then tomorrow it is. so shut up and don't argue. and some stuff actually happened that day. but i'm a shy boy, so i won't mention it. heheh. suffice to say, i guess life is kinda like writing a novel. if you stick to the same page forever, there's no way you'll ever finish your book. so keep writing. who's to say what tomorrow brings? =)

then wednesday came. and i went to sentosa, with dy and the rest, to play rugby. palawan beach was quite shit though, so most of us have abrasions now. hahah. mel came late, as usual. stupid girl. =X. anyway, after rugby, we played soccer. then the sky went dark. so that ended our time in sentosa. went to vivo to see the lace, but mainly to eat carl's jr's. mmm. carl's jr's. then met PENKNIFE. eh, i mean jj, for a while, then went to find alyssa and mel. shopping as usual. but then at least the topshop in vivo is considerate. got waiting benches. after that, we took a train back home. mel was super entertaining, as ever. lol. went to dy's place to get her jersey, whereupon she admitted she forgot what it actually looked like. -_-. geez. i thought I was old. hahah. walked her back after that, cause it was kinda late. actually, so was i. but i decided to be nice and walk her back, even though i had somewhere to be. but no, she wasn't grateful. don't believe what she wrote on her blog. all lies, i tell you. hahah. after that, went home, changed, then headed to pantat's place to drink. well, they drank. i just enjoyed the company.

then thursday morning. woke up, left pantat's place and reached home by 8. fixed the switchbox, but then the heater is screwed now. fuck. hahah. cold showers for a while i guess. then woke up kinda late. went to simpang with dy, shaik and aldie to get paint, brushes and stuff. then painted my mum's room. i think it was done like shit, but she seems happy. well, still got tomorrow/later to work on it. then went to matthew's birthday party. had fun there. caught the last bus home, so now i'm here.

cheers

2006-12-12T07:04:00.000+08:00

Insomnia shall be the death of me. That, and excessive smoking and drinking.
and i think i know the reason...sigh...does it always have to hurt so much?

Cheers

2006-11-14T23:23:00.000+08:00

hey people, sorry, i know i said i'd try to post more regularly, but most of the time i'm either too busy or too tired...hahah...

well, been rather packed recently...school's been fine, so has life in general...shall blog about today though...

had culture module today...symbolisms in literature...hahah...sounds like a rather dry topic, but i guess it worked out fine...after school, walked to the MRT with beckylala(LOL) and julian...saw aisyah along the way...then saw james at the platform...so went to NYJC for Wolfpakz training...I WISH! hahah...peerose, jamal and faizal all had national training, so apparently training was cancelled...so i decided to go watch the NATIONAL SQUAD train at CCAB...hahah...damn motivated to train now...i'll be a happy man the day i get to wear that standard chartered tshirt...

another thing...while on the bus to CCAB, this blind guy boarded the bus, and rather coincidentally, sat beside me...we talked for a while, until i got off at CCAB...and this kinda got me thinking...for a perfectly healthy and fit guy, i think i spend a lot of time being rather pessimistic...not many people really enjoy the fact that having the full use of your 5 senses is a blessing in itself, so from today, that's a little something that i'll be thinking about...

anyway, guess that's about it...oh yes, congrats to melissa and co. for getting 1st in the plastic underwear thingy...oops i meant environmental fashion show =X

all the best in the up-coming games...you know who i'll REALLY be supporting =)

cheers

Camouflaged To The World

2006-11-06T01:38:00.000+08:00

hello...updating again...trying to keep the habit...

well, life's been sort of different the past few days...spent a fair bit of time on my own, thinking...til the point where i actually forgot how to play touch...fortunately, it came back to me rather quickly...but the fact that i actually forgot how to play one of my favourite sports is rather troubling...still...it just goes on, life a carousel, yeah?

anyway, had the afore-mentioned touch game, at NUS, on saturday, against the SRC guys, then mixed, then the NUS guys came down, so we played them for a little while...after that, i went for lao cb's bbq...hahah...happy birthday lao cb! met dy, han, xuan, rasheed, aldie and mel at tanah merah...then we took 14 down to ecp and spent like 20 minutes walking to the god damned pit...saw my uncle and met up with dy's CLT/james' classmate Ivor AKA Chee Yong...lol...small world...anyway, we still reached before lao, xiang, joey and rach...who took a cab...so while rasheed and lao were setting up the fire, i went to play a little bit of modified contact/touch with dy, aldie, xuan, han and rach...hahah...contact for all, except rach...then after the game, went to eat, while mel counted planes...by the time we left, i think she hit 40+...lol...

today, woke up around 2...waited for shaik to call, but he was still asleep, so i just stoned, ate, thought about stuff, and used the computer...went for dinner with my family, then parkway with shaik...then we went to have a couple of beers, to wish shaik luck for his papers, at 1 of roxy's many pubs...fortunately, 1 of the cleaner ones...then home...sleep was supposed to come easily, with the beers, but somehow, i'm still up, typing this post, and now that i'm at the end, i realise i still can't sleep...

I know I can't always make you happy when you're down...
I just wish I could...

cheers

2006-10-30T21:20:00.000+08:00

well, haven't blogged for 15 days...Pol-ITE has started...we haven't had a really fantastic start, losing to TP last wednesday, and to SP today...BUT...compared to the friendly we had with TP, where we got totally smashed, i think we did loads better...keep up the great work guys...today's match with SP was hard...they got about 60 points ahead of us, but kenny pulled in 3 with a fantastic dropkick...not great, but then, considering the fact that RP Rugby hasn't even reached it's 1st birthday, we're getting better...

nothing much to blog about, other than rugby...school's fine, so is life...=)

I'll never mind being your home, when you're tired and alone
I say this for the passion, not for fame or fashion
It's not a lie, if you believe it

Seeing you today was nice...=)

cheers

2006-10-15T23:58:00.000+08:00

I have a theory, that life can only be good for a while before it starts fucking up again...over the past 2 weeks, life was alright, far from perfect, of course, but good at least...and i think it's fucking up again now...haiz...

well, friday went to DXO for the party...the queue was fucking long, but once we got in it was much better...atmosphere was quite good, and ruth almost lost her bag...hahah...lucky found it again...i left early, cause i was taking the NR home...

...but still woke up late for saturday's game against Bedok Kings...saw say hai, imran and firdaus there...and hafiz played for us, due to lack of players, and wilson being concussed...we lost, but scored a try off matthew...overall performance is getting better, i guess...after the game, went to town to meet eugene and malvina...found myself sitting next to johann for at least 20 minutes without either of us noticing each other...cause i had my hair down, and he cut his...hahah...so slacked with the 2 of them til they went home, then saw gab and sheila...waited for the rest to come before heading home...

today, we had mohsen's surprise birthday celebration...oscar award goes to james, for being a bastard...hahah...we went to sen's gf's place to set him up...when he reached, he got splashed with water, eggs, and james shot his cream on him! (ok i know that sounds wrong, it was whipped cream) hahah...then we had cake and all, before leaving...fun i guess...the last of it...

cheers

2006-10-11T00:51:00.000+08:00

well, i'm back...hahah...not much to blog about...school's been fine, as ever...

oh yes, speaking about school, those people, if there are any who come here, from parry primary school, apparently from what i understand, there's a dinner coming up cause the school is closing down...so i'm not sure if anyone wants to go, but i thought it'd be kinda fun if we did...so update me...

POL-ITE games in 2 weeks...feeling excited/nervous...hahah...training hard, cause i want to give a good, hard fight to all our opponents...

and i think i should create a new blog, to detail my injuries, cause i just got a new one...hahah...somehow managed to 'crack' (as in 'crack knuckles') 2 of the bones in my left palm, resulting in me typing this post with one hand since i can't bend my 3rd and 4th fingers on the affected hand...hahah...

and to somebody (you know who i'm referring to, don't act blur, you BIGGER stupid dumb kukubum =X), i'm not getting injured on purpose lah...i just think people don't like me much...heheh...

cheers

2006-10-06T00:59:00.000+08:00

quite amazingly, this is my 2nd post in a rather short amount of time...hahah...

somehow i managed to pull my achillies tendon...couldn't have come at a better time too...pulled it on tuesday night, then limped around RP on wednesday (and pulled it again during training), now's thursday, and tomorrow is our friendly against TP...so yeah, hoping for no injuries...

hmm, guess that's about it...

cheers

2006-09-28T19:27:00.000+08:00

well, it's been a while, so yeah, sue me =P

just finished the holidays, and had the last day with W24P...kinda sad i guess, but life goes on...not as we don't meet anymore...but i still miss you guys, so thanks for making the 1st sem of my RP life really fun...=)

went to beijing, hongkong and guangzhou during the holidays...it was an experience i guess, even though it's a little wierd being in a country where the dominant language is chinese, and me, being the sorry-i-don't-speak-china me, having some communication problems...but it was fun still...though i doubt i ever want to return...hahah

then had a gathering for W24P...went to eat steamboat at marina...fun times...then went to the arcade with melvin, james and shaun(sp?)...watched them play house of the dead 4...or was it 3? i think i was laughing too hard to notice...lol

after that, it was the bangkok trip! went with my family and shaik...went shopping, got 2 ginnas, and went to see a tiger show...hahah...i really reccomend anyone who visits thailand to go see 1...don't get me wrong, it's not the porn aspect, rather i think it's so ingrained into the reputation of thailand that it's almost like a cultral thing...hahah...so go see 1!

so that was basically my holidays, summarised into 3 paragraphs...for more current news, it's back to school again...new semester, new classes, new faces...guess i'm 1 of the lucky few from W24P, cause i got Mr. Ong as my enterprise faci again! hahah...damn lucky...4D is really like winning 4D sia...hahah...new class also seems like it's got the potential to be a fun class...lots of friendly faces...and the facis seem quite alright too...

for rugby news, Wolfpakz lost to police in the 3rd-4th placing of NRC Div 2...sad i guess, but then we got 4th out of 16 clubs...that's like 12 other clubs, all with long histories, that got beaten to 4th place by a club which has only been around for 2 months, a club that plays mainly with 15-18 year olds, save for peeroz, jamal, fendi and the rest of the 'old folks'...heheh...i think that's quite a good achievement so yeah, quite satisfied, and happy that i joined the club...thanks to their training, i'm more or less been picked as the 1st team winger for RP...so POL-ITE (formerly known as IVP) games coming soon...i don't think there's much hope for winning the tournament, but then i feel i want to at least beat some teams, score some tries, and such...the team's finally beginning to bond, so that's good news...maybe by next year we'll be able to provide some stiffer competition...

anyway, today, went to play 'catching', or 'police and theif' if u prefer, with the RP security...hahah...long story...then the suay part...got fucking caught for littering at causeway point...FUCKING $200 FINE SIA...knn...but then i guess, just not my day...

tempted to say life sucks, but then i guess some things, and some people, especially 1 person (you know who i'm referring to) makes it all worth going through...

well, til next time...i'll try to blog more regularly, but then i'm kinda busy with school and all, so i'll try my best lah...

cheers

2006-08-17T22:36:00.000+08:00

well well well...guess who's back again...hahah...sorry, have fallen back to my once-a-month schedule for posting entries, but i'll try to post more often...

1st off, my 18th birthday was on the 4th of august(yay i'm legal!) and i'd just like to thank everyone for making it the most memorable birthday i ever had. 1st, to james, mohsen, ram, raymond, hanting and hasita, for throwing me into the pond...hahah...2nd, to louis, wilson, nick, hadeep, owen and matthew, for making me walk into the reflection pond with 18 pebbles stuffed inside my boxers...by the way, i have the videos of me being thrown in the pond and me walking in on my pc...gonna upload it to Youtube asap, and try to show it here...and last, but not least, kiang tuck and shaik for planning the surprise birthday party with my mum at my house. thanks to nicole, cheesim, baoyi, yvonne, fiona, xiuxia, nehneh, dave, jj, guowei, ah gu, mingwei and johann for showing up. =)

and yeah, i've recently joined Wolfpakz...it's a new rugby club which is slowly but surely making a name for itself...lots of current and ex bds players there, and the atmosphere is great.

gonna end my 1st sem in rp soon...changing class and all...i guess i wanna thank everyone in W24P for making the time from 17th april til 24th august really enjoyable...it's been a great 1st sem...

well, holidays are coming soon...will be going to beijing and hongkong, then to bangkok on a seperate trip with my family plus shaik and kt...

guess that's about it...

cheers

2006-06-14T23:43:00.000+08:00

i've just updated my blog...linked some more people, changed the 'about me' section...

it's been a busy few days...had my combined chalet with kt and sheila, and the W24P chalet...it was kinda stressful planning it, but i guess it all worked out fine in the end, so yeah...

then i got warded into gleneagles for my op...i'm now tonsil-less...and my throat is still hurting like a bitch, but i've been assured that the pain will fade. well, it had better. gotta thank shaik for trying to arrange for everyone to visit, and also fate, for having some people, like zam and nic, just there in time...

i also realised that generally in life, you can usually run, and run damn far while you're at it, but usually, it's just impossible to hide...have been sitting back over the past couple of days just facing reality for a while, and i guess i'm just trying to deal with it, a bit at a time...

cheers

2006-06-06T06:32:00.000+08:00

goooooood morningggggggggg all...hahah...

well, it's been a busy past few days...planned 2 chalets, doing food preparations and what not...it's been a major headache, and also fucking stressful, but i guess it's going as well as a last minute planned chalet's preparations should go...hahah...just like to let all you people know, if you haven't been invited, it's not cause i don't want your company...try me not even being able to find the time to message u guys...but i guess i've contacted almost everyone by now, save for 1 or 2...

i've also just let go of a grudge which i've been burdened with for almost a year...i guess the world isn't all black and white...even good people do bad things at times, so i'll finally let go of the anger and just learn to forgive...true, it's not going to be easy to get back to where we were, and god knows if we ever will...but the cold war has ended, so at least there's a step in the right direction...

well, guess that's it for the update...hoping the chalet will be fun for everyone...heading off to woodlands soon to meet the W24P ruggers for brekkie before training starts...

cheers

2006-05-24T01:01:00.000+08:00

well, rugby training started today...must say i enjoyed myself totally...hahah...missed the feelings of playing and just training...basically just did simple passing drills...cause most of the year 1's are inexperienced players, as in never played rugby before...but then they seem to be catching on quickly, so who knows? may even be able to make it for the friendly in june...hopefully lah...itching to play already...hahah...

as per normal, school's been great...finished all the UT's already, so just waiting for the results to come out...and hols are just around the corner...meaning class chalet, and my chalet(hopefully)...

unfortunately...june also means tonsilitis op...=\ but then, according to the doctor, i should be perfectly fine, just prepare for some discomfort in the throat...meaning it'll hurt lah...all doctors are liars...hahah...

well...off to bed...

cheers

2006-05-14T06:59:00.000+08:00

so yes, i've just reached home...narrowed down my most likely reasons of dying to just lung cancer and over-exhaustion, but who really gives a flying fuck yeah? i don't...

been having quite a lot of fun recently...school, for once in my life, is something that i really look forward to...laughter, fun, games and learning make a good combination i guess...being with friends, both new and old, is probably one the best feelings i know...

but then, life, as per normal, is not all good...as of friday morning, i lost a friend/brother...wish i could say he'd be sorely missed, but then i'd be lying...the more i think about this situation, the angrier i get, so i shall just leave this topic now...

kinda realized it's been a while since i saw some of my friends...i guess as our paths in life split apart in different ways, it just gets harder to maintain contact as we go along...but this is my life...it's not perfect, but it's what i wished for...and that was to be friendly, to know more people...now as i look back, i realize it's actually easy to make friends, but to keep them is another matter entirely...but no matter, as i said, it's my life, so i'll do my best to deal with it as much as i humanly can...all i want in life currently is to enjoy life, be there for anyone who needs me, study and work hard, and finally, to live my life with as few regrets as possible...

cheers

2006-04-26T22:42:00.000+08:00

well, i promised an update, so here it is...

been somewhat preoccupied recently...term 1 of RP has started...and amazingly, i'm enjoying myself...hahah...sort of looking forward to each and every day of school...made some new friends, and the class atmosphere is great...too bad, i had to break our perfect attendance record...i've gotten tonsilitis...so i'm currently feeling like fuck...can't eat most food, can't drink most drinks...nothing much to do except take meds, take herbal stuff prescribed by my granma and aunt, and sleep...got 2 days of MC...hope i'll be alright for school by friday...or else...the op...haiz...remove my tonsil...that'll be the 1st operation of my life, if it happens...think i'm gonna feel like a little part of me is gone...and it'll be true...heheh...

and yeah, i'm single again...don't really know what to say about it so yeah...been trying to avoid thinking about it at all...it's a problem that i can't really solve, so i'd rather focus my energies on other things...guess that's how most guys will feel...or so i've seen anyway...maybe someday when i've got an answer for it i'll post again about it...

oh yes, the 1st training of VKFC came and went...5 members...myself, shaik, johann, dave and guowei...lousy field conditions, but other than that it was alright...however...we may have to temporarily halt our field training, due to lack of manpower...so for the time being, we're moving on to court...hahah...

k lah, that's basically it...i'll try to make more frequent posts, if i'm able to...til then, take caer all...

cheers

2006-04-20T20:52:00.000+08:00

the end

2006-04-19T00:19:00.000+08:00

yes, i know i haven't been updating regularly, so i promise a large one soon...maybe tomorrow, at school or something...

cheers

2006-03-10T01:34:00.000+08:00

so i'm back, with almost a month of events to blog...and being my usual intelligent self, i've already forgotten most of the things i've done...old age is catching up with me...soon i'll be in a wheelchair, watching all you young people running around happily...

well, went clubbing on the 18th of feb...went to phunk bar, at MS...quite an eventful night...couple of fights here and there...and i got totally drunk with kt...drunk as in doing my best merlion impression all over the place...but i'm a quiet drunk...not like some people (*cough* KT *cough*)...hahah...amazingly, no hangover on the 19th...hahah...

nothing much til the 24th...cause that's the day i crawled out of bed at some ungodly hour of the morning to send natasha tan shan shan to school...hahah...but waking up to see her smile was worth it...went home and back to sleep, til the afternoon...pulled on my work clothes, then went back to damai to fetch her...went to tampines...bought her lunch, then walked around TM til i had to go to work...from 6-2.30...kt they all visited me at work...had my break with them, then went to meet them after closing...walked around orchard til 1st bus, then went home...

...and woke up before noon to go to sentosa...met nat at her house bus stop, then went to tampines MRT to meet nehneh and eugene...the rest either met us at bedok or straight at harbourfront...ate at harbourfront market, then went to sentosa...more precisely, palawan beach...then tossed random people into the sea, suntanned and played frisbee...then kt cut his leg on a barnacle...so he went to wash it, then went to get first aid...the lifeguard, jason, was quite friendly...got his senior to attend to kt, so everything was alright...til i got cut while playing captain's frisbee...so went to find jason, since he was sitting near us cause his tower was under renovation...so while i was getting treated, dian ning went in to take my place...and somehow injured his back, so he couldn't move...wound up having to be sent to SGH for treatment...suay i guess...paid $3 to get injured...so that kind of dampened the mood i guess...we went to change up...then headed to siliso beach cause SOMEONE (you know who you are...heheh) wanted to eat ben and jerry's...and then back to harbourfront...they took a bus to city, while i took a train with nat...cause she was heading home, and i was late for meeting gav, mel, dy, aly, yx, lao and han...went to seoul garden at taka...ate, talked and whatnot til 10+, then took a cab home...

and on the 26th, had work til 6...nat came to meet me, so we wound up walking aimlessly around orchard, before finally deciding to go to heeren...while crossing over to heeren, saw nicole and trevor...said our hellos and stuff...hahah...so walked around heeren, then took 65 to tampines to send nat home, then went back for dinner...after that, went to slack with the dalu locals...hahah...

met nat on the 27th as well...went to tampines again...walked left, right, center, up AND down...hahah...then sent her to tuition at simei...waited for her to finish, then walked around for a while, before coming over to my house...had dinner here, then i sent her home...and confessed to liking her while on the way...hahah...so reached her home...after sending her, walked across the overhead bridge to the bus stop to take a bus back...and sometime during that period, her neighbour's bicycle caught fire...what an evil omen...=P...but lucky no injuries or anything...

28th sent her to school again...more of the usual...hahah =)

1st march also sent her to school...but went for a 1 day job after that...damn boring...but those of us who weren't working, including my shanshan, came to suntec to find us after work...then went to simei to visit Lee Sia Lun AKA Gabriel Lee...hahah...cause he sick...sent my dearest home, then went back to simei green...went home quite early though...and missed a show...wahahaha...

2nd march...shared our 1st kiss =) hahah...then went to holland v for training...had dinner at holland v market, then went to Wala-Wala for a pint of Hoegaarden...went back to meet the rest at SK...then some of them came to my place to stayover...

3rd march...went from exclusive dating to being a couple...=D

4th march...had training til evening...then met shanshan and gavin...went to cine for dinner...saw yvonne there...so she joined us...mel left after dinner, and yvonne went to join her friends...went with gavin to suntec to meet amos...slacked around, then went to send nat home...after that, took a cab home with gavin...

5th...went to watch Final Destination 3 at lido...cinema was damn empty...hahah...morning show...after that walked around forum before work...then i started work, while she went for her CIP...met some of her friends after work...walked to dhoby, then went to katong...after that, came home and collapsed...

more of the usual til the 8th...
HAPPY 16TH BIRTHDAY DEAREST!
hahah...spent the day with her...=)

9th...sent her in the morning...then went with kt to bukit panjang to fetch shermin to the airport...unfortunately, she missed her flight...so she went to beach road with kt to get a new ticket, while i went home to sleep til 4+...then went to meet her and her friends for her birthday dinner...

and 10th...today...happy 1st week dear =)

cheers

2006-02-15T04:46:00.000+08:00

well, valentine's day was yesterday, so happy valentine's day to all the happy couples who celebrate the day of the patron saint for lovers...

collected O level results a couple of days back...results are as follows...

EL - A2
Maths - C6
Combined Humanities(Geography) - B4
Combined Science(Chemistry/Physics) - A2
Design & Technology - C5
Chinese - Ungraded
Chinese (B) - Pass
Co-Curricular Activity - A2

so my L1R4 would be 19...R5 28...and 5 credit passes...so i guess there are a number of options available to me...shall be filling up and submitting the JAE form before i go sleep...

had work on thursday...1st day at outlet...was quite fun...the working atmosohere is quite enjoyable...got 'bitten' by a splinter though...hahah...other than that, though it was a busy day, everything went quite smoothly...

friday, after collected results, went to dave, nehneh and guowei's combined b-day chalet...1 of the better chalets that i've ever attended...insane consumption of alcohol and cigarettes, with loud music and food always spells fun i guess...hahah...chalet was til sunday...so basically all night parties...went back on sunday and had dinner with family...then to dalu to meet the rest...

monday was alright as well...slacked around, and gabriel etc came to my place to do their valentine's day gifts...went down to eat supper at 85 and then sabo'ed dave for his birthday...hahah...some left around 3...jj, ming wei, wei li and kt stayed til the morning...slept a while, then went to meet te same people....spent the night walking around bedok doing stupid stuff...and just got home...so off to fill out my JAE application, then bed...

cheers

2006-01-31T04:24:00.000+08:00

can't really sleep...kinda have my mind on things...went to my old blog...re-read some stuff again...making me feel...i dunno...not better, not worse i guess...-_-...everything written there seems like it was written by someone else...have i really changed that much? it's less than a year ago when i was writing all that stuff down...

my life seems to be flooding with problems again...one major problem over, and another one crops up...keeps going on and on like some kind of fucking never-ending carousel...sounds like a wonderful new year coming up eh?

well yesterday the whole group of jj, thomas, kt, eugene, gavin, gabriel, sheila, yvonne and vanessa came to 'bai nian'...after that, i went to princess to watch 'Fun with Dick and Jane' with them...after that they went to changi mac...ate a bit...then some of them left...me, gabriel, kt, jj and thomas met dave, then went to dalu to slack...got a shock there...lol...til around 4, then we all left...

today was dy's group's turn for visiting...after my place, went to bullu's house, then i left for my family gathering...then went to find dy they all at sherman's house...after that, went to aldie's house...met gavin and melvin...then melissa they all left first...leaving me, joe, dy, aldie, han, gavin and melvin...so we headed to simpang for supper...saw dy's family there...then after that supposed to head over to meet kt etc...but then by that time they were all about to go home...so i just came home straight...

ah well...gotta get up early tomorrow...probably staying home, unless something comes up...

cheers

2006-01-29T17:20:00.000+08:00

been a tiring past couple of days...let's start with thursday...

after i woke up, got nagged at constantly by my parents, so after a while it just got irritating so i went out...met up with gabriel, jj, natasha and sheila...slacked at dalu...saw evonne with li ting at dalu...made plans for friday...then nat left...then sheila...after that melvin arrived...then kt and shermin...and guowei...and jj left...so me, gabriel, kt, shermin and melvin decided to go down to ECP to slack...so kt went home to change and shermin waited for him below his block...then suddenly kt called me...apparently a shophouse under block 57 had caught fire...a shophouse selling incense, paper money, cheap cigarettes(NOOOO~..... =P) and etc...so i guess most of u can imagine the size of the fire...was kinda scary, cause 57 is thomas' block...but fortunately he was alright...saw evonne again at the scene...so we talked for a while...then she went back...and we left for ECP, after we met thomas cause he had to evacuate...i saw my wife at ecp...hahah...with eileen...chatted with them then they went off first...so we went to the lighthouse to talk an slack...then gabriel and kt came to my place to stay over...

...and overslept for friday...cause we(me, kt and gabriel) went back to school for the CNY celebration...saw nic there...and confirmed with sean goh that i'm school approved for the CLT course (haiz...bye long hair...you'll be missed) so that's great...shall be seeing plenty of BDS for the next few years...then after school went to dalu to slack...then kt went to shermin's house, and gabriel came to my place...had lunch, then went out to meet alyssa, yixiang, bullu, rasheed and melissa...waited at paya lebar for about 1 hour for auntie zakiah and nadiah...then went to dhoby...waited with gabriel for sheila...saw jihadi while waiting...after she arrived, they went to settle some stuff while i rejoined melissa etc...they went to kfc to eat, and waited for dy, aldie and joe to arrive...then they went to watch memoirs of a geisha and i went to far east to meet gabriel and sheila...took 14 to dalu...met jj, vanessa and shaik there...and some new people...bao yi, mark, joel, celest and yvonne...then thomas and dave arrived...so we left dalu for OCH...nothing scary...sat in one room and told ghost stories...kt and shermin joined us...then we went to the supposedly haunted chalet...again, nothing scary...after that, went for supper, and looked at the transvestites...hahah...then went to one of the chalets and sat at the playground...and started trying to break a coconut open...lol...then they played basketball, then went to cheers to get drinks before going to changi beach...hmm...i think i'm falling in love with changi beach...so nice, peaceful and quiet...left at daybreak, and headed home to sleep...

...til about 5...headed upstairs to my aunt's place for reunion dinner, then went to benedict's house for his birthday celebration...LOL...not gonna blog out waht happened, suffice to say i'm delighted...heheh...after we left lucky heights, i waited for gavin and melvin to arrive...then me, gavin, melvin, kt, dave and gabriel went to ECP...slacked at mccafe...then went to a break water...dave and kt went of 1st...then after that we left too...so i finally reached home at about 5...just in time to hear my mum having a nightmare...and i thought the noise was a cat...heheh...

well, later, dave, kt, jj, thomas, gabriel and maybe guowei will be coming over for CNY visit...blog later about it...

cheers

2006-01-28T07:08:00.000+08:00

I'm tired. Very tired.

2006-01-26T05:34:00.000+08:00

just got home from jojo's birthday celebration...(HAPPY 19TH BIRTHDAY JOJO!) hahah...had quite a bit of fun...but then kinda getting a little bored of clubbing...lol...and i'm not even legal yet...hahah...well, kinda shagged now, shall blog the details when i wake up...

cheers

2006-01-25T17:53:00.000+08:00

i paid $20 for an ant bite...hahah...typhoid injection was pathetically anti-climatic...went in, sat down, jab, stand up, go out...lol...then slacked at shaw center with melvin...sat at mac and talked...til around 5...then i took a long bus ride home...been a while since i did that...hahah...slept kinda early (for me, early is defined as the sun has not risen yet) and woke up early (this early means before lunch) today...slacked at home, til i got bored, so i started blogging...so later going jojo's birthday...blog about it when i get back...

cheers

2006-01-23T20:14:00.000+08:00

went out for some games a couple of days back...played soccer(i still suck at it) and some DotA(i suck at that too)...either way, had fun...with most of the usual people...with the exception of both mels and gavin, one cause he stays at the other side of the country and the other cause she's sick (get well soon)...and gav's in the army...and the inclusion of rimiko...so yeah...

been downloading a few movies...watching them at home...managed to get football hooligans, or green street hooligans as it's known overseas...movie about the green street elite(GSE), the firm of west ham united football club...

tomorrow probably heading out to get the typhoid injection done...update some more then...

cheers

2006-01-20T00:42:00.000+08:00

thankfully, i'm kinda recovered from the stomach flu...still feeling faintly nauseous though...woke up at 7am today...was sleeping since 6pm yesterday...watched doom and 15...then downloaded music til kt came over in the afternoon...played NFS:U2 for a while, then he left...i stayed home til evening, then went out to meet dy, joe and aldie...now sitting at home, will be heading to dalu to meet gabriel, kt and dave later...

o yes, i already know 2 people who will be heading to 51st intake with me...gen and daniel...yay! lol...

enjoying my last days of long, dyed hair and freedom...

cheers

2006-01-19T10:28:00.000+08:00

sick again...gastric flu...=\...keep vomitting...haiz...anyway, went for an interview yesterday...at coffeebean, in forum...got hired, so starting after CNY...hmm...blog more once i'm feeling better...

cheers

2006-01-15T08:24:00.000+08:00

Children of the Night, UNITE!

hahah...someone said that...can't remember who though...too much alchohol in me, plus smoke (cigarette and smoke machine) in the air...went to Gas Haus last night...celebrated jj's birthday (HAPPY BIRTHDAY JJ!)...quite a nice place...not bad for a pub...has a dancefloor, pool table, and slightly quiter areas to chill...music is alright, though slightly erratic(r&b, techno, dangdut AND bhangra? wtf?) may celebrate my 18th birthday there...see how...anyway, met gavin at the army shop near my place cause he had to buy stuff...then i ate my dinner, then headed down to bugis...met up with jj, thomas, gabriel, dave, guo wei and dunno how many other people...waited for them to eat finish, then went down to Gas Haus...went in and started drinking...free flow of housepour from 10-1, so we enjoyed it...after about an hour, they started playing techno...then some cock shouted gang poem...kena caught by the bouncer...lol...after that no more techno...wahhaha...then some guy said hi to me...and i swear i've never met him in my life...lol...drank tequila shot for the 1st time...almost puked...FUCKING strong sia...lol...didn't expect it to be THAT strong...stayed til closing time, which was at 6...then took 12 back to bedok area...ate breakfast at the bedok south market...then came home...damn shagged...will be sleeping as soon as this post is done...

sometimes girls are really confusing...no means yes, yes means no...that kinda thing...so many girls keep going on about how they want to find true love, someone who will love them not for sex, but for who they are...but when someone who does love them for who they are comes along, they just choose not to accept him...like, wtf? but then, like i said, they CHOOSE not to accept him...it's a choice...being rejected isn't really a problem...sure, it hurts a little, and maybe damages the morale a bit, but it's ok...time will heal it...it's being played out...THAT'S the problem...is it really so fun to keep someone waiting and waiting, when the decision is already made that you will not get together with that person? there's food for thought, go think about it...(this paragraph is NOT directed at anyone in my life, but rather, someone who played a brother of mine out...)

you can tell me i'm damn steady to you, that you love me, that no matter what problems i have you'll stand with me to solve it, but please understand, it takes quite a bit to earn my forgiveness if you've backstabbed me once, and much, much more to ever gain my trust again...and then of course, there are some things which i won't forgive, things which i have little choice but to take revenge for...cause if i have the chance to teach you a lesson, then i'll take it, before more people fall for your bullshit...so just remember, i'm a better actor than you think...(directed at someone within my personal circle)

i swear to god i'm really beginning to hate the word revenge...but then sometimes there's really no other thing to do...so to the 2 people mentioned in the earlier paragraphs, understand that almost everything is a game to a certain extent...life, love, revenge...and generally, i don't back out, and i don't play to lose...

cheers

2006-01-13T20:35:00.000+08:00

so yar, a few days into quitting and i think i'm beginning to understand what PMS feels like...think i should have waited til i'm fully recovered before trying, but for now i'm gonna stick with it...

cheers

2006-01-12T03:15:00.000+08:00

ok, so since i can't sleep, i changed the tagboard after numerous complaints...should work fine now...alrite...gonna try to get some sleep...nite

cheers

2006-01-12T00:49:00.000+08:00

well well well...mum found cigarettes in my stash...poetic justice i guess...since i was talkin to joe earlier about quitting...not in trouble, but then i guess it's time to quit...sorry for the lack of advance notice, but then this is the best way to quit...benefits of me quitting are as follows...

1) dad has quit cause of his deal with me...
2) easier for people around me to quit...
3) save $$!!!
4) health
5) a reason which can't be mentioned on a public blog...

so yes, i know this is not the 1st time that i've said i'll quit smoking...so i'm sure some people aren't going to believe me, but then it's alright...shall strive to prove you disbelievers wrong...

cheers

2006-01-09T05:21:00.000+08:00

just reached home...was expecting a good night's rest til something came up...so had to go out...left home at about 2...so going to sleep now...later have NCC meeting at 3...then mebbe going to get my new phone...

hmm...beem going through many of my previous posts...like from months back...hahah...life has changed so much...i don't even hang out with most of the same people anymore...moved on with life relatively quickly...happy in ways, and filled with regrets about some other stuff...hahah...being random i guess...

cheers

2006-01-07T03:29:00.000+08:00

Well it appears I'm now blogging during witching hour...

finally the CCA fair is over...managed 49 people, could be better, but then again it could have been worse...parade with NCC as the GOH was the same could be better, but then again could have been MUCH worse...For BDS NCC standards it was pretty good...went nuts during the CCA fair...harassed joalin to join NCC...got invited to join band, guides and netball...crapping around all the way lah...then went for dinner...with zakiah, melissa, cheesim, joe, dy, fukie, sherman, alyssa, aldie and bullu...after that, went to dalu area to meet jj, ben, gabriel, and shaik...after that went to ben's house to play majong...well...they played...i stoned...then kt arrived...he went to play xbox...I left at 2+ with shaik...went for supper...then walked home...

today i got angry over a stupid reason, at a person who doesn't deserve my anger...i don't think she knows that i was angry at her, or even angry to begin with...but i still feel bad, and so the only place i can apologize is here...so i'm sorry...

and yes, revenge is tiring...screws your mind, screws your life...sure, there are easier ways, but my theory is do it once, do it well, then fuck off and never look back...

cheers

2006-01-05T23:19:00.000+08:00

well, i guess if i thought i could escape the battlefield of classroom politics for a few months i was damn wrong...

been back to NCC for the past couple of days...and already i'm knee-deep in the crap again...not to say NCC is crap...it's a fun CCA, 1 of the few things in my life i don't regret...it's just that the constant manuvers some people just pull to out-do others is just plain sickening at times...here we are, guard of honour contingent for CCA fair and speech day, supposedly part of the toughest uniformed group in secondary schools, and juniors to the men in green who defend our shores, and yet we're arguing over petty squabbles and disagreements...

and the best part...I'M NOT EVEN A FUCKING CLT YET...god only knows how much more crap there will be once i get the white stripes...no more just avoiding the problems, i'll be in the thick of it...haiz...i swear to god it's just so childish and irritating at times...

today didn't really do much...went training, then dinner at simpang with alyssa, nadiah, zakiah, joe, dy, aldie, bullu and chinhan...after that met jj, dave, thomas and gabriel at dalu area...now back home...

revenge may be sweet, but it's also fucking tiring...

and i'm just getting somewhat exhausted...

cheers

2006-01-05T07:29:00.000+08:00

well..this is my 130th post for this blog...hahah...but then who's really counting?

got my upper ear pierced...finally...hahah...doesn't really hurt as much as it irritates...got it done on monday, which is damn clever of me, cause i was originally planning to go back to BDS on tuesday without my ear studs, and my bleached hair sprayed black...but NOOOO, i just HAD to go pierce my ear...then i couldn't get the fucking stud out...mum tried pulling til blood came out...-_-

so tuesday arrived...went to gavin's house 1st, and waited for kent to arrive...he changed to his uniform then we went on to dy's house...waited for dy and joe to get changed, then on to BDS...basically just sat around feeling sad for the sorry state of BDS NCC, greeted teachers and waited for the whole rehersal to end...after that, went to bedok camp with gavin, kent, sherman, dy, joe, alyssa and AUNTIE ZAKIAH (sorry capslock jammed...oh it's better now... =P)to grab some dinner...gavin and kent left 1st...then sherman...so dy and me waited with alyssa and AUNTIE ZAKIAH (dammit it happened again...wtf? it's better...again!! heheh...)for the bus, then walked to dy's house...met aldie outside then went in...dy went to bathe, then we left for tampines central...which is actually different from tampines interchange...i just found out recently...wahahha...sorry, i'm just a small town boy from bedok...bought $5 you-know-whats illeagly, then sat at eliza's bf's restaurant and chilled...helped dy a bit with his EL homework, then left for home...

yesterday...slept til evening...hahah...after that went to tanah merah to meet melvin...while waiting for dy, some guy approached me and offered to buy a stick from me...i declined the cash and gave him 1 anyway...then mel asked for 1 and i asked him for money...wahahah...i swear i'm a bastard to the worst extent...then yet another guy approached us(do i have a HI-I'm-friendly-sticker pasted on me somewhere?) and tried to shove his bible down our throats...like, i'm sitting there with bleached hair, 2 piercings and smoking...do i REALLY look like the kinda guy you wanna bring to your church? sorry man, i've done my time with christianity...maybe 1 day i'll repent for all my wrongdoings, but for now, i'm still a happy sinner...anyway while that guy was talking, dy arrived...so once he finished we headed to simpang...finally tried the western food there...not really fantastic, but it's alright...expensive though...headed home for a chatting session...then fell asleep after a while...

...and woke up at 3...lay in bed staring at the ceiling til 430, then gave up on a good night's sleep and started gaming...too much on my mind i guess...hahah...hmm...somehow i kinda miss school...i dunno why...when i had school i hated it like nobody's business but now i sort of wish i still had school...which goes to show that people usually don't appreciate what they have til it's gone...like yet another part of my adolescent years faded away...going to be 18 in about 8 months time...technically legal but then the only thing i haven't done is drive...i've already bought cigarettes, alchohol and gone clubbing...what's left? sometimes i kinda feel that singapore's fast-paced lifestyle is really going to be our downfall...i used to be so into punk-rock, gigs and jamming, but now i'm not even in the scene anymore...all because the lure of clubbing has approached...and the only reason why i wanna go clubbing is cause if i don't enjoy it now, then when? 3 years more and i'll be 21...working life is gonna start...how in the hell am i going to be able to go out and enjoy myself on a regular basis? no sit-back-and-relax, try sit-down-and-work...i think if my parents can afford it, as soon as i'm done with NS, i'm gonna disappear off to another country for further studies...go there and enjoy the laid back lifestyle for a couple of years before i havta return here and to reality...

ah well...gonna try to get a bit more rest and get back to my usual semi-cheerful self after all this depressing shit...

cheers

2006-01-02T09:42:00.000+08:00

happy new year people...though it's a little late, who cares? it's the thought that counts...hahah...

well...been slowly recovering since i last blogged...shall just update about how i celebrated the new year...

started the last day of 2005 by oversleeping...wahahah...supposed to meet melvin, but like i said, overslept...wound up ending my hibernation at around 3-4 in the afternoon...after that, just spent some time talking with my family...had dinner...(indian food, of all things...i swear my mum is on drugs...) then left the house to meet botak...eh, i mean gavin...hahah...reached tanah merah late cause of 14's usual delays...then went to bugis to meet the whole group...namely rasheed, joe, dy, aldie, yixiang, bullu and melissa...they just ate so we had a drink, then went to princep for shisha...

amos was at netz, so he joined us for a little while...we stayed there til the new year dawned, then i made a few phone calls, wished a few people...then we decided to walk down to bontanic gardens...more specifically, a house near bontanic gardens...hahah...while walking we encountered some banglas though...1st group sprayed melissa, which kinda pissed me and the rest off...cause they were targeting girls mostly...so went to confront them, and they went all 'a thousand apologies' on us...yes, i know that statement was racist, but they deserved that...after that incident, we just went 'crusing for bruisings'...in other words, bangla-bashing...but it didn't really work out...better for us i guess, or we'd probably have spent the night in lock-up...so eventually we reached bontanic gardens...i had the same partner as the OCH trip...and she ALMOST cut off circulation to my fingers...again...hahah...but it's alright...hmm...not really good to actually put down the experience of the house in words, but i'll say that this was not as bad as some other places that i've visited...but the vibe was there lah...left the house and got a cab for melissa...then she went off...poor girl got kinda caught for lying to her mum...as for us, we sat at the entrance to the road til i kinda noticed something while smoking...then we proceeded to the kopitiam outlet at bras brasah...had supper there, then headed over to netz...and played 'illeagle' LAN gaming...hahah...DotA and CS til they left at around 6...me and gavin waited for amos til around 8, then we cabbed back...got home and felt wierdly awake...so stayed up til about 12, had lunch, then KO'ed til 8...woke up, had dinner and played F.E.A.R. for a while...smsed some people...then slept...

...erractically...hahah...kept waking up...so alternated gaming, sleeping, smoking and d/ling stuff...so now just here blogging...later should be heading down to parkway for lunch with family...after that meeting melvin to go queensway buy shoes...i'm goin there to look for t-shirts and try to get my ear pierced, if there's a piercing parlour...

well, guess i should blog about the past year...it's been full of shit to a certain extent...hahah...nah...2005 is the year that has matured me the most...true, i miss some parts of my old self, and some bits of life i wish i still had, but they're kinda gone for good...it's alright though, cause i guess that's life...no point sitting around bitching about it, cause it won't help for nuts...just gotta go with the flow, and start learning to appreciate what i have, instead of craving for what i don't...as they say, let go of the past and embrace the future...it's a new year, so it's a fresh beginning...and i guess i'm gonna take this chance to start building my life after O's...well, once again, wish everyone a happy new year, may the new year bring you wisdom for your years...

cheers

2005-12-28T06:03:00.000+08:00

ok...it's 6am in the freaking morning and i can't sleep...naturally my body has to do this to me barely a month after i finish secondary school life...so instead of smoking out the window i shall blog, cause i think it's somewhat healthier...(comments people? smoking or talking to yourself?)...and also cause SOMEONE (yes you, the one who's reading this and happens to be named de xin) kinda keeps nagging me to blog so i shall...so ladies and gents, boys and girls (wait wait, if you're still under 'boys and girls' category you'd best stop reading now and visit a porn site or something...lesser mental corruption...)WELCOME TO YET ANOTHER ENTRY ABOUT MY BORING LIFE!!!

so...been kinda busy these past couple of days...let's start from the 23rd...dad arrived in s'pore...supposed to meet joe, dy and both mels for yet another slacking session at town, but joe was grounded, dy had to attend his cousin's wedding and melissa couldn't come out...so wound up just me and melvin in town slacking...kinda bored...til we decided to attend his NS upper-study's ex-girlfriend's 18th birthday at chinablack...unfortunately, this time, the smile-and-17-year-old-ID approach didn't work, so had to resort to the guai-lan-face-and-fake-ID...heheh...it worked, so then i was happily expecting yet another night of loud R&B, alcohol and semi-hot chicks(hey...EVERYONE looks quite hot under club lighting...and a couple of jugs of vodka mixes just helps to smooth the entire process over...) however...the fuckin place got raided...lucky i was downstairs when the cops were upstairs...saw my wife there with another guy...heheh...thank goodness we're divorced...lol...saw my cousin too...naturally i was invisible to her lah...i swear to god one fine day i'm gonna smack her...anyway, stayed at black til about 4-430...then went to newton circus for supper/breakfast...started talking about russell peters, of all things...hahah...left newton at about 6, reached home, showered and was snoring at about 7...

24th...woke at lunchtime, followed mum and dad down to city to collect the food for later's gathering...went home, ate lunch, then fell asleep to my dreams of flowers and unicorns...then was rudely awakened by daiyu's hand suddenly stroking my...well...you get the picture...(you see what i was saying about the mental corruption thing?) so they were using the PC and watching movies and eating...eventually gavin and melvin came over...then we waited downstairs for melissa to arrived, then we went to melvin's place to spend the night...

25th...basically up all night...drinking, smoking, talking cock...melvin did a couple of tarot readings for me...as usual quite accurate...scary shit...hahah...joe, chinhan and aldie left at about 6...me, gavin and melvin went downstairs at about 730...ate, then brought breakfast for dy and melissa...decided to watch king kong, but then the d/l version was quite sucky...so decided to go cinema...dy couldn't go, cause he had to go meet his mum...so me, melvin, gavin and melissa went to lido to watch...but gavin didn;t watch with us cause he was kinda tired, and wanted to spend some time with his parents before booking in...so the people watching were me, melvin and melissa...bought the 550 show, cause the earlier shows were filled...so spent a couple of hours eating BK and drinking coffee at starbucks...then went to the cinema...was talking to melissa during the show and she noticed uncle melvin was like sleeping...hahah...then at the ending she cried a bit...don't blame her lah...the 1st time i watched the original version i cried too...and that was before the monkey had all those humanlike facial expressions...but i kinda agree with her...nowadays people don't really seem to feel movies...like, if a scene is sad, and it makes you feel like crying, then why not? i mean, what's the point of paying 9.50 if you're just gonna sit there and stone for the next 2 hours? it's like smoking without inhaling...waste of time...well, back to where i was, after the movie, took a train back to tanah merah and sent melissa home...after that, went to meet gavin, amos and joyce for a while, then headed home...

26th...HANGOVER DAY...supposed to go to joe's bbq, but like i said, hangover...spent the day at home sleeping...

27th...went out with melvin to go job hunting...i was kinda stoned though...after job hunt, went to yck to find ghim...help her with some stuff...then came home...slept for about 3 hours, then decided to start blogging cause i can't sleep...so yeah, that's it...

cheers

2005-11-27T00:55:00.000+08:00

so i'm finally back from my super long O level hiatus...not that anyone cares right? yep, thought so...anyway, life has been pretty screwed up lately...but on the bright side, O's are over...papers weren't too terrible i guess...and i guess i'm gonna blog abt my secondary school life in BDS...

guess i'll focus mainly on my upper sec, cause my lower sec was kinda boring, and also cause i can't really remember everything about it...yes, old age, so sue me...so yeah, entered the school without knowing anyone, cause i was from the north side of s'pore and just moved over after PSLE...got to know some people from class, and a few more from NCC, and kinda stuck around with these people all the time...mostly the same from sec 1 to sec 2...

sec 3 we started the year on a brand new campus...and with brand new pants...hahah...made more friends, cause i was in a new class...took over the leadership of NCC...still not really social til the end of sec 3, when i joined the student ambassador program...that was really the beginning of my social life, cause i kinda got to know many more people from different ages...and where i met her...

so...sec 4 was much more fun...from the few people i knew, i got to know more people...and i finally fufilled my wish to take up a sport...joined rugby...won some stuff...took my N's...made it through to sec 5...

sec 5...the most complicated year of all...good times and bad, all rolled together...still in rugby, won some more medals...NCC finally made it to gold for the 1st time in history...studied like i never studied before, and finally, ended my time in BDS after taking my last O level paper on the 22nd of november...

so...it's been a meaningful year i guess...matured me in ways...i've gotten beaten up, betrayed, but then i've know true brotherhood and friendship too...felt hate, fallen in love, been rejected, felt physical, mental and emotional exhaustion and pain...i've drank til the point of drunkeness, smoked til i couldn't take any more cigarettes, found out my parents are actually divorced...stuff like that i guess i'll remember for a long time...

people sometimes think that i have a great temper...cause i seem to be able to take things so easily...the truth is, i cry and bleed just like anyone else on the planet...and sometimes, it really does feel like the end of the world...but for me, i just try to look at things in a practical and realistic manner...what's done is done, the past is already gone, and only the future awaits...

still, life goes on...when i wake up tomorrow, it'll be a brand new day...so no point being troubled...

well, i'll end here...

cheers

2005-10-24T03:31:00.000+08:00

so i'm sitting in the airport now...it's 330 in the morning, and i'm not goin to school tomorrow...or as kt says, later...he's next to me right now, reading every single word i type out...that pervert...beside him is ben...we're having a study break now...later back to chemistry...wanna complete mole concept and organic chem...then if still have time, do some physics...so ya, that was a comprehensive guide to everything i'm doing here...wrote it cause i'm bored, just sitting at mac using free internet while i could be studying...it's ben's fault, he's a bad influence...=D

cheers

2005-09-27T00:53:00.000+08:00

what have i done wrong in this life? i've done my very best to be there for anyone who ever had problems...if you meant something to me, and you had a problem, i'd make your problems become my problems too, and then i'd try to solve it together with you...and always, when i have my own problems, i'll try to stand on my own 2 feet, and tackle them myself...but when i finally fall, and turn to someone for help, i get kicked in the face...i just NEVER EVER knew how much those words could hurt...

2005-09-26T22:48:00.000+08:00

just like that...in an instant, life has changed....10 minutes ago, i was recovering from a lousy day...now? now i'm feeling so screwed up that the earlier part of the day seemed fantastic...it doesn't matter what happened, what matters is that i now feel like giving up...on life, studies, everything...i don't even remember why the fuck i was studying so fucking hard for O levels in the 1st place...fuck O levels, i don't even feel like getting out of bed tomorrow...

fuck the world

2005-09-23T16:21:00.000+08:00

helooooooooo...i must apologize to all my loyal readers(as if i really have any) for the lack of updates...

well, more or less done with prelims...still have D&T paper to do, but going to take this weekend to relax...cause, they way things are going, it'll probably be my last chance to have some R&R before intensive studying period...gotta do well for O's, or all those carefully thought out plans will be for naught...

think i screwed my prelims though...especially maths...science i have a bit of confidence...but overall, i'm not so sure...think my chances of going for CLT course are swiftly going to zero...can see my rank epaulets flying away...

heard from hoori that i fucked up my compo...very little grammar mistakes, almost no punctuation mistakes, but I FUCKING UNDER-DEVELOPED MY POINTS!!! prediction is that i'll get a C5-C6 for EL...i'm really fucked up with myself for that...and 1 tree along Bedok North St.2 has a little less bark cause of my frustration...and my knuckle has a cut from that tree...

on the other hand, mdm yong just told me today that my D&T folio and artifact may be able to get around 50-60 marks...not excellent, but it's a LONG LONG way from 9/70, so i guess i'm satisfied with that...will do as much practice on D&T papers as i'm able...target for D&T is at LEAST a B4...hoping for a B3 or maybe an A2...

been out studying quite a bit with pao, kiang tuck, shaik and huiwah on a couple of days...studying with them seems to help...while we do talk, at least the combined temptations of my bass, guitar PC and TV aren't there...

went out for supper at 85 on tuesday night, wednesday morning...cause of that supper, a certain NEIGHBOUR of mine was almost late for the chemistry paper...heheh...shall not mention names, but i'm sure the NEIGHBOUR will know who i'm talking about...hahah...

also been out with evonne for a couple of days...always nice to catch up with an old friend...spend some time talking, and what not...

today i had the unique opportunity to sit just diagonally behind that special someone while taking my CL(B) paper...haha...i just have to publicly admit that she looks DAMN BLADDY CUTE when she's doing her paper...hahah...sorry for the outburst, just had to get that off my chest...heheh...

been thinking quite a bit on the topic of revenge lately...to me, revenge is a ten-fold thing...hit me once, i'll hit you back ten times, hit someone who is worth ten times more than yourself in my eyes, and god help you, cause mark my words, i'm going to fucking kill you...

the above paragraph is specially dedicated to a sepecific fucker from BDS sec 4B, 2005...enjoy your happiness while you still have it...

well, guess that's just about all that's happened in my life recently...til the next post, so long y'all...

If I could be your first real heartache
I would do it over again

cheers

2005-09-11T22:48:00.000+08:00

here's another one of my increasingly infrequent updates...been studying at the airport everyday since wednesday...with pao, shaik, kt, and dan on wednesday to thursday morning...then with evonne on friday...gavin and cs on saturday afternoon, and kt and ben on saturday to sunday morning...hope all this helps...

feel like i'm losing alot of things...

can't wait to get the O's over and done with...

cheers

2005-08-31T22:40:00.000+08:00

today was teacher's day...so happy teacher's day, to anyone who ever taught me anything, from teachers who taught me maths to people who taught me the true meaning of brotherhood...to all these people, this day id for you...

quite a fun day...saw many people get what they deserved...teachers getting huge presents from students...and someone getting screwed by some people...shall not be specific...my real brothers will know waht i'm saying...heheh...sec 5's today were undefeated in soccer...haha...makes my leg itchy...but think i gotta do work 1st...saw many old friends...and some people whom i'd rather avoid...

huiwah is evil...she gave me nightmares about dancing girls =
tomorrow is the beginning of september...resolution for the month is to study harder...wanna get much improved results for prelims...

guess that's it...

cheers

2005-08-30T18:17:00.000+08:00

so i've just recovered...AGAIN...gastric flu this time...the most uncomfortable of the lot...but thanks to that sickness and lockjaw...i now have VALIUM in the house!!! whee!!! valium is a drug like exstacy...but it makes u stoned instead of hyper...hmm...wonder what it's like to be addicted to drugs...=P

now for more serious stuff...school has been back to it's usual stress-inducing self...prelims are 2 weeks away...and i think i'm going to fail them...meaning no CLT course...D&T folio needs a LOT of re-working...my combined humanities and maths will probably fail...mebbe my CL(B) also...

everyday is getting just a little more taxing for me to deal with my 'family'...not all of them obviously...but some are those that i'll really trust, and others are slowly proving themselves as untrustworthy...time will tell...

since 5th august...i guess i've been apathetic to a lot of things...also have lost much of my willpower to resist negative influences...hope these problems don't push me to do something stupid...

things between me and her are...more friend like than ever? which is good i guess...

zakiah looks cute with specs...=P

I'm only a liar...but I'm the best

cheers